Looking Back ...

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him and he will direct your paths.  Proverbs 3:5-6

After months of consideration, lots of hesitation, and most of all prayer, I decided to make a temporary move to the US Virgin Islands. I planned my 'sabbatical' to St Croix from mid-October through at least the end of the year.  I envision two months as a good gauge of time to get a feel for the island and decide from there how long to stay, what to do, etc.  Ideally, I will be down here 6 months and back in Charlotte by next summer.

I've been wanting to move to the Caribbean for two years now.  Okay, back-track four years ... I got married on St John - fell in love with the Virgin Islands then.  Surprisingly everyone involved in the wedding, from the minister to the caterer to the hair stylist, was from the US (pretty much everyone except for the steel drummer, who didn't show up anyway.  He was a month late - nothing like 'island time'!).  I was so intrigued by all of these people who just picked up from the States and moved down - they all said the same thing, that they were done with Corporate America or tired of the hustle and bustle of American culture.  Given the stress I had always put myself under through school, work, etc., I was like "let's go!".  Obviously that never seemed like a realistic option.

So back to two years ago - pretty much from the minute I was single again and going through the most difficult experience of my life - I got rid of everything I owned, moved in with my brother for what was supposed to be two weeks, and basically wanted to be ready to pick up and go as soon as opportunity came knocking.  Well, there was never a knock at the door, but the desire to live in the Caribbean never went out the window.  For two years, I applied for every accounting, audit, and HR job in the Caribbean - I didn't care where or doing what, I just wanted to get out of Charlotte and live in Paradise.  It seems so obvious now that I was just looking for an escape.  I would have completely been running away from the situation and into the unknown.  I would not have had a plan once I left, because I certainly was NOT going back to Charlotte.

And this is where God stepped in.  Amazing how over the past two years, I have been blessed with so many incredible people who have become some of closest friends (and I can't imagine not having them in my life today), my existing friendships only grew stronger, my faith has been restored and is stronger than ever.  There's a reason no jobs ever came available; there's a reason it took a year and a half to sell my house -  I was meant to be in Charlotte to heal and move on.  God knew I wasn't ready to leave.  And now, I've recreated my own life in Charlotte and made it home again - and I know exactly where I'll be going back to.

This spring, I celebrated my official freedom with the opportunity of a lifetime (well, the first of two this year!) in New Zealand, Australia, and Hong Kong.  I was extremely lucky to have friends to visit in each of those amazing places, but I also took some time to myself to reflect, and came back with a change in priorities, new perspectives, and the dedication to be grateful for the life I have and not take anything for granted.

I had spent two years assuming I would find a job to support a move to the Caribbean.  Everything else in my life was moving forward, and I was ready to as well - but now I was at a crossroads.  A big thanks to my brother turned landlord, as those two weeks turned into two years.  During that time, I always considered it a temporary stop, so I never bought a piece of furniture or anything that would make it feel like a permanent move or settling back in.  Seems sad given previous possessions, but it made me simplify.  It also made me mobile - how many other opportunities would I have to be so free to just pick up and move?  And the bigger question was, would I actually move without a job?  Well, obviously anything out of the country was now out of the question.  And then it hit me:  the Virgin Islands, a US territory!  I had spent time on both St Thomas and St John, but for some reason St Croix seemed to intrigue me, as it was considered the 'in between' of the other two islands (St Thomas is very busy and commercialized, while St John is incredibly beautiful, but quiet).  I started doing all sorts of research, and before I knew it, I had friends left and right telling me about their experiences in STX or their friends who lived there, etc.  So knowing I wasn't alone, I felt more comfortable about my upcoming decision.  All signs started to point to yes! 

I went through several phases about what to do with work.  Should I (and could I) just up and quit without a back up plan?  Should I ask to work remotely or would that take away from my experience?  I ended up asking for a leave of absence, but it was not approved.  What?!?  It would have been such an easy decision had they said yes - I would just go down and come back after 6 months, then back to reality.  But by them saying no, I was forced to make the biggest decision of my life.  Was I really willing to quit my job and move to the Islands without having anything else set in stone? 

I went on social hiatus for the week (which, if you ask my Charlotte friends, is pretty much unheard of) and took a solo trip to the beach that weekend to dig deep, put things in perspective, and really think through all of this that had been on my mind and in my heart for two years.  I came back from the trip with the feeling that even though I knew it was crazy, I had peace and comfort that it would be okay - that it was something I needed to do.  I still don't know why, but I am extremely grateful to have the opportunity to find out. 

I just felt that I would never be ready to settle back down until I embark on this journey (or as I like to say "get out of my system").  I know this is a huge leap of faith.  I agree it is a crazy decision, but one where I have had a lot of time to think through and pray - and a decision I foresee no regrets. I believe the opportunity to make this move hadn't come until now because I needed to be in a place in life where I wasn't leaving to run away, but instead have never been happier with life and truly am grateful to be able to fulfill this dream.

So here I am, living in the Islands with a view of the Caribbean from every window, knowing this is an experience I will always cherish, a decision I will never regret, and the faith that it will all work out.  It is amazing to think that I came out of the worst experience of my life as a better, stronger, happier, and more positive person than I could have ever imagined possible.  I’m excited to finally put my faith first and know that God has a plan.  I don’t know where life is going to take me, but I am excited to follow His path and find out.  It's been a pretty good trip so far ...